Comments on: Sexual Harassment: Beginning to Engage?

By: Diego Olveda

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By: colorpurple

colorpurple — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 07:05:34 +0000

@Ravi, Scarface and all those who think sexual harassment is “trivial” and women are being “hysterical” about it
i am a woman in India. i wear all kinds of clothes. i have faced sexual harassed in public places and in work place. and i have done all i can to fight against it. Now i have to say that i have faced sexual harassments even at the age of 11 in public place. i was not dressed provocatively then, nor do i step out of the house now “looking” for men to sexually harass me. sexual harassment is not a pleasant experience, and here is the thing all those who propagate “women should take responsibility for men’s so called lack of control and dress properly or stay at home at night or dont go drinking..blah blah blah” forget that sexual harassment takes place not because the woman does something differently, but because there is a presence of a sexual harasser!

i have faced sexually harassment when wearing traditional salwar kurta and have not faced any sexual harassment when i have worn something that has revealed my legs or cleavage. the difference was not what i did, but the presence of a sexual harasser. and that is exactly the point

it is not my duty to be responsible for a man’s libido. it is my right to own public space as any other human being (regardless of sex). it is my right as a human being to have a safe working environment free of any harassment (upto and including sexual one). if men here claim that its the women who have provoked them somehow are actually articulating their lack of choice, and somehow assuming the role of a poor victim, even to the least sensible person that logic will seem flawed. please Ravi, Scarface, get a sence of perspective.

sexual harassment is not what men think it is, it is the woman’s perspective of what they think is sexual harassment. just like any law, there can be instances of misuse, but that does not mean that the law should not exist to uphold basic human right.
p.s. i know i am 2 years too late in posting this, but this still is a hugely relevant topic to me.

By: High Priestess

High Priestess — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 18:20:54 +0000

To the guys here talking about the way Indian women dress and how they should dress more decently…

I have been all over India – it’s homes, offices, shops, streets, and I have never ONCE seen an Indian girl or woman indecently dressed.

So that leaves me wondering, what are you talking about?

By: sonal

sonal — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 14:06:25 +0000

It is commonly said that if a girl wears a skirt she will become target to sexual harrasement.
But even if we wear normal clothes like salwar kameeeze, it dosent stop ,recently my married pm was looking at my breasts when i was bending and explainig a problem, he even touches my breasts from side when he sits next to me accidently and even says sorry.
since he is very close to the HR i cant even report it to any one … this is going on for a month now
recently he hugged me from behinde holding my breasts, i was shocked ,he said he was just trying to scare and it was a practical joke.

By: sana

sana — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 12:17:02 +0000

i am doing a design project on sexual harrassment, after vising an ngo exipped with enough material, and enough cases to make any woman in her senses angry, i walk out seething in anger, promising myself to bash up any guy who so muchas stares at me now, and to put myself back in my place, a motorcycle zoomes by me, spanking my behind, even before i had a chance to turn and see, it made me feel so helpless.
i am now doing a series of posters, as a hypotetical project.
there are two options for me. to sympathise. or to empower.
i was suggested to make something like broshures or pamphlets which could be put in toileteries so a woman can read it in her own space.
now how trivialising is that… just by sympathising arent the women who have faced it place automatically on a lower pedestrial.
now i feel that most women doint even know that these remedies, the vishakha guidelines exist, and refuse to acknowledge the shw is a reality which could happen to anyone, inculding themselvs
i am proposing a series of poster campaign, whch would have disturbing and provocative pictures in order to put them in a public place and let people know , mostly women, that they are being objectified.
and that it is a disturbing reality.
soemthign like an image of a plug point in an office environmet stuffed with wires and plugs, in a dilapidated condition.
hope to hear responses and suggestions.

and ravi i find it extremely distasteful that you dont even have the decency to frame such repulsive words in a way which does not throw such light on your opinions. typical male chauvanist to say the least.

By: Aditya

Aditya — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 10:56:48 +0000

Also, regarding clothing; you may not realise, but women in Afghanistan under Taleban were required to wear a burqa (the least sexually provocative dress I have ever seen). This did not lead to any appreciable reduction in rape statistics in the country.
Women (and men) should be free to wear what they like (within reasonable limits). If just being ‘different’ is license to molest a woman, then I am sorry, but you are no better than the Taleban.
Also, most offices tend to have either official or semi-official dress codes. And women adhering to these dress codes are the victims of the harassment.
Please stop getting on a high horse about what some women do to some men and think about what many men do to most women.

By: Aditya

Aditya — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 10:40:52 +0000

@ravi: Each act in the law is not designed to prevent it’s misuse. Instead, all misuse of laws is covered under contempt of court.
At the same time, you might not be aware of how many women are raped, abused and sexually harassed in our country in comparison with the numbers of men who have been falsely accused. Almost every single woman in India will be able to give you at least one example of how she has been harassed or teased or molested, while I doubt that you will find more than a few thousand men (even stretching the limits) who have been falsely taken to court for harassment.
You seem to be intent on trivializing the fact that many many women in India are in vulnerable positions and do not have any recourse to simple processes even in large corporates.
If there were more men who would stand up against harassment of women in the workplace, the laws would not even come into question.

By: ravi

ravi — Sun, 14 Oct 2007 12:06:54 +0000

May i know why previous comments was not posted.

Ok, let me address Ms.indu here,

Madam, show me what are those CERTAIN PROCESS WHICH CAN BE USED AGAINST THE WOMAN WHO MISUSE 498A. if you told, it really a great thing for men, who are victim of 498a.

Upto my knoledge, there are no such process.

By: ravi

ravi — Sat, 13 Oct 2007 00:49:17 +0000

@indu

It’s not a myth, we can’t neglect the possibility by stating like that. clothes can provoke even decent men also.Don’t you ever heard a suggestions for working woman who have night shifts ,from experts,”don’t wear provoking dresses”.why they told like that, is it true that all men who are harassing woman are just doing it because they want to teach a lesson to that woman for being bold.

I read a survey in one of column in paper which is dedicated for woman issues…what men look in woman? the answer is men won’t stare every woman that they saw, they stare at woman who are looking different, by means of dress or other. you asked me that how can a woman break social norms ?? tell me what are those social norms that nowadays woman (not all woman)hasn’t break until now.nothing.May be you wrote that by assuming a uneducated village woman.

PLEASE TELL ME THOSE PROCESESS IN LAW ,from which a man can punish his wife by the law for the misuse of 498A,If you give details , you really did a great favour for men who are victim on those casesiI NEVER SAW A WOMAN WHO PUNISHED FOR THE MISUSE OF 498A.IF SHE PUNIHSED FOR THAT 90% MISUSES WILL OVER. If adithya is right, then after 498A men also become more vulnarable, putting case on men is much easier than getting cinema ticket. so where is the protection for them from being subjected to harasment legally. At the same time, domestic violence is not a gender issue. Only men can harass woman is really a myth.may be men like me now are little bit insecure, but not feared.

At the same time you didn’t mention anything about misuse of harassment in workplace. they are really hight than any other.

By: Indhu Subramaniam

Indhu Subramaniam — Fri, 12 Oct 2007 06:50:37 +0000

@Ravi: it is very unfortnate that you still believe the biggest myth that women’s clothes are responsible for sexual harassment rather than understanding that it is men’t attitudes to women( however they are dressed) that is the issue. nobody walks in naked or semi naked into a workplace. it is coded in social mores that any girl/woman who is confident and dresses for herself needs to brought down to her knees. how can she break out of social norms that prescribe that she should be subordiante. she should express herself in muted terms lest she should attract the wrath of the powerful. any act of hers including dressing well and walking in public is an affront to the male ego- there goes a bold woman. she has no right to be that way… so lets teach her a lesson. thats what is working in an avg street romeo’s mind. it has everthing that has got to do with male attitude rather than what she wears.

you refer to the issue of misuse- esp of 498A, let me tell you that the actual complaints registered under this act don’t even represent the extent of the actual problem of domestic violence. so everyone who loses a case in court should be punished? since by logic it was a false case to start with? there are certain processess in law and judiciary which takes care of false complaints. women routinely are subject to the most degrading and dehumanising treatments they are the most vulnerable and endure violence- the law as aditya has pointed out is to protect the vulnerable. most women don’t want to waste time in long drawn court battles. even in genuine cases they prefer keeping quiet because of the inept and laborious ways justice is dispensed in this country. yours is an irrational fear, or maybe rational even, the fear that men can’t get away with what they are now getting away with.